God first. Everything else will follow.

 

What To Do If Somebody Knocks On The Bathroom Door While You Are Using The Toilet

  • Say “I’m pooping”
  • Knock back
  • Shriek loudly
  • Nothing
  • Say “I need an adult”
  • Say “Nobody is in here, please come in” 
  • Ask “Did you hear that?”
  • Cuss
  • Threaten to poop on the toilet seat if they knock again 
  • Make kissing noises

(Source: heckacute)

getoffmybloghoe:

person: im just throwing my opinion out there

me: *slaps opinion out of the air* not in my house 

All I’m saying with this picture is that if you don’t have real live peacocks at your wedding you need to step up your game.

All I’m saying with this picture is that if you don’t have real live peacocks at your wedding you need to step up your game.